445. What is a Charcuterie or Charcuterie Board? Seems everyone has jumped on the trend and anything seems to go. The word "charcuterie" is a French term for a line of cooking devoted to prepared meat products, primarily from pork. The Italians have a different meaning for "charcuterie" as they interpret the word to mean "salted meats", which includes preserved whole cuts of meat and force-meats. Now, what is a "forcemeat" you ask? They are spreadable mixtures of meat and organ meats like pâtés and such. Now, Americans have turned the charcuterie board on end and have changed the whole purpose. I've seen candy charcuteries, fruit charcuteries and yes, even egg charcuteries.
So, what is right and what is wrong? I guess in our day and age, if you want to be original, ask a real butcher or simply follow the simple "3 3 3 3 Rule". That is, three meats, three cheeses, three starches and three accompaniments such as fruit, nuts, brined or pickled items and veggies.
You can arrange on a wooden board, plates, marble slab or as I've seen, right on the surface of a table, covered with butcher paper. It was quite clever and so unexpected.
So, when you attempt to be a charcutier and serve a charcuterie at your next football watch party, soiree, holiday party or event, remember the "3 3 3 3" Rule. That is, three meats, three cheeses, three starches and three accompaniments such as fruit, nuts, brined or pickled items and veggies to make sure it is a true charcuterie and not an American bright idea. If you want to do a candy, fruit or egg display, call it a buffet, arrangement, array, presentation, exhibition, panorama, ostentatiousness, etc. Of course I'm being facetious, but, now you understand.
"Adulthood: Where lunchables are now called a charcuterie."
~Anonymous Humor
"I've learned from past mistakes that you should never own something as fun as a charcuterie board and keep it for 'special occasions,' because it's highly likely that the people you saved it for will somehow end up not having been worth it in the long run. Then, you'll just end up lamenting all the missed opportunities you had to enjoy the thing all by yourself."
~K.J. Micciche, The Book Proposal
